Indian Army is a beautiful place to be in. They make you not just visit, but live in the most exotic places. So this August we were in luck once again. My husband got posted to exotic Eastern Ladakh, and we were overjoyed. This is our third posting to Ladakh, and we can't seem to get enough of it. The truth is that we are in love with Ladakh. It is the most beautiful place on Planet Earth. Moonscape! Yes, I believe this is how the surface of moon looks. Well, I don't really care about that. All I know is that no other place can boast of such a blue sky (the bluest of the blues) and such hues of mountains (all shades of browns, yellows and some reds). It is the most picturesque of all places. Each picture looks like a work of art.
I can't thank God (and the Indian Army) enough for bestowing such a fortune on us. I bow to the majesty of these mountain ranges, the perfect place for a recluse like me. I can feel the presence of God in the very air!
And I haven't yet told you about our very own private river, that flows right outside our hut.......
Until next time.........
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Think of abundance
These days Shimla is facing a serious shortage of water. One can see serpentine queues at various natural water points. People fight over their turn at filling water. What has happened to the cool tempered Shimlaite? Some blame the government; the others curse the tourists, while some lay it all at the God’s door. After all if God wanted us to have more water, there would be more rains and more snow!! No one looks at their own deeds. No one likes to take a share of the blame. If we had not been so careless about wasting our precious water when it was aplenty, we would not have been where we are today.
A visit to Lower Bazaar evokes similar sentiments. People ask for the prices of vegetables and groceries. Look at each other, throw up their hands in resignation, discuss inflation, and proceed to make their required purchases. One common refrain that stays in the mind is that it is alright for the rich, they can afford all the luxuries, but it is us middle class who have to make the ends meet. Does this statement ring true to you?
It has been noticed by many social scientists that real wealth is a state of mind. The difference between the rich and the poor is not in how much money they have, but in the way they talk, the way they act, and the way they think. Some so called ‘moneyed’ people can also grumble about lack of money, while some so called ‘paupers’ can be seen being grateful for what they have. Is there a difference in this thinking?
The way you think is what you create in your inner world. The way you talk and act is what you express in your outer world. If you want to be truly wealthy, you must be consistent in your thoughts, speech, and actions. We generally communicate lack in every way. “I know there won’t be any water today. We can’t afford to eat fruits. Money doesn’t grow on trees. Where will the money come from?” Do these sentences seem familiar to you? We think, and speak this language all the time. No wonder it gets reflected in our outer reality.
Elements in our environment affect our consciousness. Everything that we see around us impresses the idea of poverty or wealth on our subconscious. Look around your house. Are you holding on to some broken and dilapidated stuff without replacing it? Such things transmit energy of lack / poverty. When there are signs of abundance in the environment, the energy of abundant supply is transmitted. When you feel abundance, more abundance flows into your life. The subconscious impression of lack creates lack in our lives, while the impression of abundance creates more abundance. It is a vicious cycle, and we can’t escape it.
Examine your life. Which area of your life do you feel abundant in? Happy family, obedient children, loving relationships, good job, food in the pantry, abundant sunshine, vast sky, whatever…… Whatever area in your life right now makes you feel rich, stay focused on that. Use that area to affect other areas of your life. Think of abundance in that particular area all the time and be grateful for it. Do not ever speak of lack. It requires a lot of discipline and constant vigil over your words, but the results are worth all that effort. Your constant focus on abundance in one area will bring abundance in all other areas.
Similarly take a look at your actions. If you choose to buy the best and quality product for yourself, you are conveying the impression that you are worth it. That you deserve riches! That you are the best! Does it make you feel good? Your subconscious mind keeps picking these signals all the time and keeps creating conditions in your life that resonate with your inner state of mind.
To see wealth in your life, you must start living as though you are already wealthy. It doesn’t mean that you spend money beyond your means; it simply means that you spend in a way that makes you happy. Instead of saying, ‘My god, everything is so expensive.’ say, ‘Thank God, I can afford to buy it.’ Instead of saying, ‘There is no water.’ Try saying, ‘Thank God, we have some water to quench our thirst.’ These thoughts will make a great difference to your reality. For one, you will shift from a complaining and grumbling mode to a satisfied and thankful mode. That itself is a major achievement in today’s world…….
A visit to Lower Bazaar evokes similar sentiments. People ask for the prices of vegetables and groceries. Look at each other, throw up their hands in resignation, discuss inflation, and proceed to make their required purchases. One common refrain that stays in the mind is that it is alright for the rich, they can afford all the luxuries, but it is us middle class who have to make the ends meet. Does this statement ring true to you?
It has been noticed by many social scientists that real wealth is a state of mind. The difference between the rich and the poor is not in how much money they have, but in the way they talk, the way they act, and the way they think. Some so called ‘moneyed’ people can also grumble about lack of money, while some so called ‘paupers’ can be seen being grateful for what they have. Is there a difference in this thinking?
The way you think is what you create in your inner world. The way you talk and act is what you express in your outer world. If you want to be truly wealthy, you must be consistent in your thoughts, speech, and actions. We generally communicate lack in every way. “I know there won’t be any water today. We can’t afford to eat fruits. Money doesn’t grow on trees. Where will the money come from?” Do these sentences seem familiar to you? We think, and speak this language all the time. No wonder it gets reflected in our outer reality.
Elements in our environment affect our consciousness. Everything that we see around us impresses the idea of poverty or wealth on our subconscious. Look around your house. Are you holding on to some broken and dilapidated stuff without replacing it? Such things transmit energy of lack / poverty. When there are signs of abundance in the environment, the energy of abundant supply is transmitted. When you feel abundance, more abundance flows into your life. The subconscious impression of lack creates lack in our lives, while the impression of abundance creates more abundance. It is a vicious cycle, and we can’t escape it.
Examine your life. Which area of your life do you feel abundant in? Happy family, obedient children, loving relationships, good job, food in the pantry, abundant sunshine, vast sky, whatever…… Whatever area in your life right now makes you feel rich, stay focused on that. Use that area to affect other areas of your life. Think of abundance in that particular area all the time and be grateful for it. Do not ever speak of lack. It requires a lot of discipline and constant vigil over your words, but the results are worth all that effort. Your constant focus on abundance in one area will bring abundance in all other areas.
Similarly take a look at your actions. If you choose to buy the best and quality product for yourself, you are conveying the impression that you are worth it. That you deserve riches! That you are the best! Does it make you feel good? Your subconscious mind keeps picking these signals all the time and keeps creating conditions in your life that resonate with your inner state of mind.
To see wealth in your life, you must start living as though you are already wealthy. It doesn’t mean that you spend money beyond your means; it simply means that you spend in a way that makes you happy. Instead of saying, ‘My god, everything is so expensive.’ say, ‘Thank God, I can afford to buy it.’ Instead of saying, ‘There is no water.’ Try saying, ‘Thank God, we have some water to quench our thirst.’ These thoughts will make a great difference to your reality. For one, you will shift from a complaining and grumbling mode to a satisfied and thankful mode. That itself is a major achievement in today’s world…….
Monday, May 12, 2008
Smell the Roses
All the New Age management gurus have been advising people to slow down and smell the roses in order to manage the inevitable stress in their professional and personal lives. Shimla at this time of the year is just the right place to do that. The profusely blooming rose bushes are aflame with beautiful colours: pink, white, peach, red, and yellow. The entire landscape has changed thanks to these divine blooms. The butterflies and honeybees flit around these flowers collecting nectar… the nectar of life. That is what these flowers give us whether we admire them or not.
Why are we supposed to ‘slow down and smell the roses’? In this fast paced life, it seems like a sensible thing to do. But besides that you realize that all this hurry and worry of life is not worth it. The plight of an average corporate person has reached such ridiculous heights that even on the day a person dies; he has at least thirty emails in his inbox, an unfinished to-do list, and unreturned voice mails. We in Shimla are lucky to have escaped from most of this madness.
The fact remains, that we can never get it all done, no matter how many hours in a day we work, so we might as well just slow down. Some people are fearful of the very thought of slowing down. They say, “How can I slow down? There are bills to be paid, projects to be completed, kids to raise, and so much to do in life. If I slow down, I will be left behind. The others will overtake me as my productivity will go down. The inflation will not wait for me. I need to take care of my future”. Are these fears genuine? No.
It has been proven over the years that people who take short breaks to ‘smell the roses’, throughout the day get more work done than those people who are always worried about the deadlines. Focusing on ‘energy’ management is more productive than focusing on ‘time’ management. Which side of the fence are you on? Do you spend your day with a smile or a frown on your face? If it is a frown, go out, take a look at the roses and smell them.
Slowing down and enjoying is a matter of attitude and habit. It means to stop, breathe deeply, and enjoy all the special moments of your life. Once you do it you will realize that all the moments of your life are special in one way or the other. When we enjoy our life, we become grateful for even most basic things such as the ability to walk, to talk, to write, to eat, to share, to laugh, to smile, to pray, and to live.
Slowing down also means that even when the life throws challenges at us, even in the midst of tragedy, pressure and stress; we have the ability to recharge our batteries and come through the trying times as a winner. Small activities like a walk through Shimla’s lovely flora have the power to energize us. So if you want more strength, focus, energy, and skills, take this beautiful opportunity now.
When we slow down, we not only have more fun but more success as well. It is surprising that slowing down is the hardest thing to do for most people, but once they accomplish it they can never go back to a harried life.
So tell yourself each morning that today is the day when you will slow down. The blooming roses around you will keep reminding you to do that!!!
Why are we supposed to ‘slow down and smell the roses’? In this fast paced life, it seems like a sensible thing to do. But besides that you realize that all this hurry and worry of life is not worth it. The plight of an average corporate person has reached such ridiculous heights that even on the day a person dies; he has at least thirty emails in his inbox, an unfinished to-do list, and unreturned voice mails. We in Shimla are lucky to have escaped from most of this madness.
The fact remains, that we can never get it all done, no matter how many hours in a day we work, so we might as well just slow down. Some people are fearful of the very thought of slowing down. They say, “How can I slow down? There are bills to be paid, projects to be completed, kids to raise, and so much to do in life. If I slow down, I will be left behind. The others will overtake me as my productivity will go down. The inflation will not wait for me. I need to take care of my future”. Are these fears genuine? No.
It has been proven over the years that people who take short breaks to ‘smell the roses’, throughout the day get more work done than those people who are always worried about the deadlines. Focusing on ‘energy’ management is more productive than focusing on ‘time’ management. Which side of the fence are you on? Do you spend your day with a smile or a frown on your face? If it is a frown, go out, take a look at the roses and smell them.
Slowing down and enjoying is a matter of attitude and habit. It means to stop, breathe deeply, and enjoy all the special moments of your life. Once you do it you will realize that all the moments of your life are special in one way or the other. When we enjoy our life, we become grateful for even most basic things such as the ability to walk, to talk, to write, to eat, to share, to laugh, to smile, to pray, and to live.
Slowing down also means that even when the life throws challenges at us, even in the midst of tragedy, pressure and stress; we have the ability to recharge our batteries and come through the trying times as a winner. Small activities like a walk through Shimla’s lovely flora have the power to energize us. So if you want more strength, focus, energy, and skills, take this beautiful opportunity now.
When we slow down, we not only have more fun but more success as well. It is surprising that slowing down is the hardest thing to do for most people, but once they accomplish it they can never go back to a harried life.
So tell yourself each morning that today is the day when you will slow down. The blooming roses around you will keep reminding you to do that!!!
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Smell the Roses
All the New Age management gurus have been advising people to slow down and smell the roses in order to manage the inevitable stress in their professional and personal lives. Shimla at this time of the year is just the right place to do that. The profusely blooming rose bushes are aflame with beautiful colours: pink, white, peach, red, and yellow. The entire landscape has changed thanks to these divine blooms. The butterflies and honeybees flit around these flowers collecting nectar… the nectar of life. That is what these flowers give us whether we admire them or not.
Why are we supposed to ‘slow down and smell the roses’? In this fast paced life, it seems like a sensible thing to do. But besides that you realize that all this hurry and worry of life is not worth it. The plight of an average corporate person has reached such ridiculous heights that even on the day a person dies; he has at least thirty emails in his inbox, an unfinished to-do list, and unreturned voice mails. We in Shimla are lucky to have escaped from most of this madness.
The fact remains, that we can never get it all done, no matter how many hours in a day we work, so we might as well just slow down. Some people are fearful of the very thought of slowing down. They say, “How can I slow down? There are bills to be paid, projects to be completed, kids to raise, and so much to do in life. If I slow down, I will be left behind. The others will overtake me as my productivity will go down. The inflation will not wait for me. I need to take care of my future”. Are these fears genuine? No.
It has been proven over the years that people who take short breaks to ‘smell the roses’, throughout the day get more work done than those people who are always worried about the deadlines. Focusing on ‘energy’ management is more productive than focusing on ‘time’ management. Which side of the fence are you on? Do you spend your day with a smile or a frown on your face? If it is a frown, go out, take a look at the roses and smell them.
Slowing down and enjoying is a matter of attitude and habit. It means to stop, breathe deeply, and enjoy all the special moments of your life. Once you do it you will realize that all the moments of your life are special in one way or the other. When we enjoy our life, we become grateful for even most basic things such as the ability to walk, to talk, to write, to eat, to share, to laugh, to smile, to pray, and to live.
Slowing down also means that even when the life throws challenges at us, even in the midst of tragedy, pressure and stress; we have the ability to recharge our batteries and come through the trying times as a winner. Small activities like a walk through Shimla’s lovely flora have the power to energize us. So if you want more strength, focus, energy, and skills, take this beautiful opportunity now.
When we slow down, we not only have more fun but more success as well. It is surprising that slowing down is the hardest thing to do for most people, but once they accomplish it they can never go back to a harried life.
So tell yourself each morning that today is the day when you will slow down. The blooming roses around you will keep reminding you to do that!!!
Why are we supposed to ‘slow down and smell the roses’? In this fast paced life, it seems like a sensible thing to do. But besides that you realize that all this hurry and worry of life is not worth it. The plight of an average corporate person has reached such ridiculous heights that even on the day a person dies; he has at least thirty emails in his inbox, an unfinished to-do list, and unreturned voice mails. We in Shimla are lucky to have escaped from most of this madness.
The fact remains, that we can never get it all done, no matter how many hours in a day we work, so we might as well just slow down. Some people are fearful of the very thought of slowing down. They say, “How can I slow down? There are bills to be paid, projects to be completed, kids to raise, and so much to do in life. If I slow down, I will be left behind. The others will overtake me as my productivity will go down. The inflation will not wait for me. I need to take care of my future”. Are these fears genuine? No.
It has been proven over the years that people who take short breaks to ‘smell the roses’, throughout the day get more work done than those people who are always worried about the deadlines. Focusing on ‘energy’ management is more productive than focusing on ‘time’ management. Which side of the fence are you on? Do you spend your day with a smile or a frown on your face? If it is a frown, go out, take a look at the roses and smell them.
Slowing down and enjoying is a matter of attitude and habit. It means to stop, breathe deeply, and enjoy all the special moments of your life. Once you do it you will realize that all the moments of your life are special in one way or the other. When we enjoy our life, we become grateful for even most basic things such as the ability to walk, to talk, to write, to eat, to share, to laugh, to smile, to pray, and to live.
Slowing down also means that even when the life throws challenges at us, even in the midst of tragedy, pressure and stress; we have the ability to recharge our batteries and come through the trying times as a winner. Small activities like a walk through Shimla’s lovely flora have the power to energize us. So if you want more strength, focus, energy, and skills, take this beautiful opportunity now.
When we slow down, we not only have more fun but more success as well. It is surprising that slowing down is the hardest thing to do for most people, but once they accomplish it they can never go back to a harried life.
So tell yourself each morning that today is the day when you will slow down. The blooming roses around you will keep reminding you to do that!!!
Monday, April 21, 2008
Spring is in the air
This is that time of the year when life is peeping through all the trees, plants, and grasses. Leaf buds and flower buds are making their presence felt everywhere. Soon the world will turn greener than it has been for a while. The vibrant flowers will add colour, charm, and fragrance to the environment. Oh, it is so very beautiful! One feels drunk in this beauty. Our faith in nature and its immutable cycle re-enforces itself. Have you ever strolled leisurely through Shimla’s famous wooded walks during spring time? Have you ever looked at all the tiny flowers that cover Shimla’s slopes? Shimla is beautiful at any time of the year, but right now its beauty is alive, throbbing with new life. Yes Sir, there is spring in the air and there is spring in our walk. Don’t you feel like singing and dancing with joy through this lovely weather!
Spring is telling us all that it is a good time to ‘spring ahead’ and try something new. It is time to risk something in some way, even in the face of fear. Spring has come to reassure us that all is well in our world. It is telling us that it is time to mend and heal relationships. How about sending fresh flowers to do that job? How about sending love and forgiveness along with the flowers? How about doing it right now?
It is also time to reach for the dreams that feel a little out of reach right now. After all that is what Mother Earth did during the cold winter months. It dreamt of covering itself in green glory once again. Lo and behold that dream is unfolding in front of our eyes right now. So come on forge ahead on your goals. The spring is here to egg you on!
Some people say, ‘I would like to do this but I can’t because I am scared.” What are you scared of? Are you so scared that you won’t even give it a try? Are you willing to let your dreams remain unfulfilled? Are you willing to settle for less than what you really want? Will you be able to face yourself in the long run? Will you be able to look into your eyes in the mirror and say, ‘I did my best’? The nature tells us otherwise. The trees had no doubt that they will don a new garb of fresh leaves. The shrubs had no doubt that their nakedness would be covered by glorious flowers. Why do we doubt every thing? Why can’t we be as trusting as the rest of the nature is?
The moment we surrender to the Higher Intelligence, just as the nature does, there is nothing to be afraid of. So don’t let fear of dark, cold, wintry days take over your life. Don’t rationalize your fears. Don’t be so protective and concerned about your well being. Let go. Let go of the controls and see the spring of your life unfold. Give enough credit to your faith and see the miracles happen.
The other message that the spring has brought in is to let go of the clutter in your life. Only when we let go of the old, does the new have a chance to get into our lives. So take a stock of your life. What is it that you are holding on to? Old clothes, old shoes, old thoughts, old paradigms, old ways of doing things? Give it a thought and get down to some spring cleaning. Give away things that you have not used in past one year. Re-think thoughts that do not serve you any more. Let go of relationships that are destructive or that do not let you progress on your chosen path. Are you willing to do that?
Remove all the ‘what ifs’, ‘buts’, and ‘shoulds’ from your vocabulary. These don’t serve the ‘new you’. Speak positively about your affairs. Be inspired by your own thoughts. Look at everything with new eyes. Learn from everyone you meet. The spring tells us that the life is eternal. It tells us that beauty is inherent in life. This beauty brings in unadulterated joy. This joy makes you love nature. Since you are an integral part of this nature, you tend to love yourself. And this love for the self propagates self-confidence. Are you ready to face this more loving, more joyful, more confident you? If yes, what are you waiting for? This time is as good as any other to make a beginning.
After all spring is in the air and all is well with the world………….
The Times of India, Shimla Plus, 15th March, 2008, Chitra Jha
Spring is telling us all that it is a good time to ‘spring ahead’ and try something new. It is time to risk something in some way, even in the face of fear. Spring has come to reassure us that all is well in our world. It is telling us that it is time to mend and heal relationships. How about sending fresh flowers to do that job? How about sending love and forgiveness along with the flowers? How about doing it right now?
It is also time to reach for the dreams that feel a little out of reach right now. After all that is what Mother Earth did during the cold winter months. It dreamt of covering itself in green glory once again. Lo and behold that dream is unfolding in front of our eyes right now. So come on forge ahead on your goals. The spring is here to egg you on!
Some people say, ‘I would like to do this but I can’t because I am scared.” What are you scared of? Are you so scared that you won’t even give it a try? Are you willing to let your dreams remain unfulfilled? Are you willing to settle for less than what you really want? Will you be able to face yourself in the long run? Will you be able to look into your eyes in the mirror and say, ‘I did my best’? The nature tells us otherwise. The trees had no doubt that they will don a new garb of fresh leaves. The shrubs had no doubt that their nakedness would be covered by glorious flowers. Why do we doubt every thing? Why can’t we be as trusting as the rest of the nature is?
The moment we surrender to the Higher Intelligence, just as the nature does, there is nothing to be afraid of. So don’t let fear of dark, cold, wintry days take over your life. Don’t rationalize your fears. Don’t be so protective and concerned about your well being. Let go. Let go of the controls and see the spring of your life unfold. Give enough credit to your faith and see the miracles happen.
The other message that the spring has brought in is to let go of the clutter in your life. Only when we let go of the old, does the new have a chance to get into our lives. So take a stock of your life. What is it that you are holding on to? Old clothes, old shoes, old thoughts, old paradigms, old ways of doing things? Give it a thought and get down to some spring cleaning. Give away things that you have not used in past one year. Re-think thoughts that do not serve you any more. Let go of relationships that are destructive or that do not let you progress on your chosen path. Are you willing to do that?
Remove all the ‘what ifs’, ‘buts’, and ‘shoulds’ from your vocabulary. These don’t serve the ‘new you’. Speak positively about your affairs. Be inspired by your own thoughts. Look at everything with new eyes. Learn from everyone you meet. The spring tells us that the life is eternal. It tells us that beauty is inherent in life. This beauty brings in unadulterated joy. This joy makes you love nature. Since you are an integral part of this nature, you tend to love yourself. And this love for the self propagates self-confidence. Are you ready to face this more loving, more joyful, more confident you? If yes, what are you waiting for? This time is as good as any other to make a beginning.
After all spring is in the air and all is well with the world………….
The Times of India, Shimla Plus, 15th March, 2008, Chitra Jha
Monday, March 10, 2008
The Brave Single Woman
There was a time when a woman was considered incapable of being independent. In 200 BC Manu condemned women by proclaiming, ‘In childhood a female must be subject to her father, in youth to her husband, when her lord is dead to her sons; a woman must never be independent’. For millenniums this dictat was followed by the custodians of society. But today you see independent, single women having the last laugh at Manu’s expense. They are in our offices, in our housing societies, in the markets, just about everywhere. The best part is that this number is only increasing every day.
Many women leave home for higher education. Some go out for better job opportunities. And some just want to enjoy independence. They owe no explanation to anyone. These women live life on their own terms. It doesn’t mean that life is hunkey-dory for them. Day in and day out they face their unique challenges: managing household chores, taking care of finances, overcoming discrimination everywhere, dealing with safety issues.
Despite a single woman being a reality in our cities, the cultural barriers and attitudes are difficult to bridge. That is why most independent women are not really comfortable living alone. There are people who think that it is a bold and brave decision to live alone; and there are some who think that one has to be a desperado to opt for living alone, and work for a living. There are certain men folks who offer help with a hidden ulterior motive.
This makes women opt for a roommate instead of living alone. A roommate is part of one’s support system. They can also share resources, thus making it economical for both of them. They can do fun things together, as well as share necessary chores. Yet there are times when roommates come from entirely different backgrounds. Their habits don’t match. This can be frustrating at times, but more often than not it results in an increased capacity to make adjustments in life.
Like most other cities, Shimla too has a number of single women braving it out. They live in paying guest accommodations, YWCA, and as tenants in various parts of the city. Many Shimla girls live in other parts of the country all alone. Some of them come from protected backgrounds, but manage pretty well when left to fend for themselves. Sulochana who works for a software company feels that the basic problem for a single woman lies in dealing with utility services, like plumbing, gas connection etc. The other most important aspect is safety. Though Shimla is a relatively safe place, traveling after dark makes her uneasy. She feels that local support and the support of her male colleagues is invaluable in most cases. She has very good neighbors who are part of her support system.
Power cut is a problem in Shimla. It was quite bad in February. It is difficult to sit all alone in the darkness. Sulochana’s answer to this situation is sitting and meditating in the dark. Connecting to God gives her strength to live alone. Festivals are lonely times for her. That is when local colleagues and neighbours are most needed.
Most girls who live alone find the going sometimes rough, sometimes fun, and sometimes exciting. However, they all agree that it is an enriching experience. It makes them mature and capable of handling all challenges.
So on this Women’s Day, let us give a round of applause to these brave single women, who are battling against all odds and growing from strength to strength.
But the question remains that if women are men’s equals, why is women’s day celebrated??
TOI Shimla Plus, 8th March 2008, Chitra Jha
Many women leave home for higher education. Some go out for better job opportunities. And some just want to enjoy independence. They owe no explanation to anyone. These women live life on their own terms. It doesn’t mean that life is hunkey-dory for them. Day in and day out they face their unique challenges: managing household chores, taking care of finances, overcoming discrimination everywhere, dealing with safety issues.
Despite a single woman being a reality in our cities, the cultural barriers and attitudes are difficult to bridge. That is why most independent women are not really comfortable living alone. There are people who think that it is a bold and brave decision to live alone; and there are some who think that one has to be a desperado to opt for living alone, and work for a living. There are certain men folks who offer help with a hidden ulterior motive.
This makes women opt for a roommate instead of living alone. A roommate is part of one’s support system. They can also share resources, thus making it economical for both of them. They can do fun things together, as well as share necessary chores. Yet there are times when roommates come from entirely different backgrounds. Their habits don’t match. This can be frustrating at times, but more often than not it results in an increased capacity to make adjustments in life.
Like most other cities, Shimla too has a number of single women braving it out. They live in paying guest accommodations, YWCA, and as tenants in various parts of the city. Many Shimla girls live in other parts of the country all alone. Some of them come from protected backgrounds, but manage pretty well when left to fend for themselves. Sulochana who works for a software company feels that the basic problem for a single woman lies in dealing with utility services, like plumbing, gas connection etc. The other most important aspect is safety. Though Shimla is a relatively safe place, traveling after dark makes her uneasy. She feels that local support and the support of her male colleagues is invaluable in most cases. She has very good neighbors who are part of her support system.
Power cut is a problem in Shimla. It was quite bad in February. It is difficult to sit all alone in the darkness. Sulochana’s answer to this situation is sitting and meditating in the dark. Connecting to God gives her strength to live alone. Festivals are lonely times for her. That is when local colleagues and neighbours are most needed.
Most girls who live alone find the going sometimes rough, sometimes fun, and sometimes exciting. However, they all agree that it is an enriching experience. It makes them mature and capable of handling all challenges.
So on this Women’s Day, let us give a round of applause to these brave single women, who are battling against all odds and growing from strength to strength.
But the question remains that if women are men’s equals, why is women’s day celebrated??
TOI Shimla Plus, 8th March 2008, Chitra Jha
Saturday, February 2, 2008
Lessons from Snow
It has been snowing in Shimla for past two days. The whole landscape has changed. The white metamorphosis is complete. Everything looks pristine and pure in its whiteness. There is innocence, sweetness, and beauty in it all. As I look out of my window and see the white flakes drifting in the space before falling on the ground, I am reminded of a Zen saying, ‘The snow falls, each flake in its appropriate place.’ How true it rings! The whole philosophy of life is contained in these few words.
It sets me thinking. If each snowflake finds its right place, what about us humans? We are the pinnacle of evolution, made in God’s own image. Surely we too are in our right places. Suddenly the whole human dilemma of ‘getting there’ gets cleared. We are already ‘there’. There is nowhere to go to. We must accept ‘What Is’. That includes our bodies, our jobs, our current way of living, and of course The Weather.
I hear people asking for snow when it is not snowing, and then complaining about it when it does. Same goes for rain, sunshine etc. We are never really satisfied. But once we realize that everything is as it should be, we become contemplative and eventually peaceful.
The other thing that snow teaches us is the ‘perfection’ of the Universe. Each snow flake is perfect in itself. If you observe a snow crystal through a powerful microscope, you can see its perfect formation. If God has given so much attention to a snow flake, how much more attention He would have given to us. Yes, I agree that no one is really perfect, especially when we use our worldly parameters, but the nature says otherwise. Since every thing in nature is perfect, by the same analogy we are perfect the way we are. We are beautiful in our perfection. We need to just believe in this truth.
Snow flakes are not only just perfect; each one is an individual as well. Yes, we can’t distinguish one snow flake from another but the fact remains that each insignificant looking flake has a different structure. Can you even imagine the care God took in making each one of them different from each other? He could have easily used a factory mould. How much simpler that would have been! But no sir, He did not take any short-cuts. He chose to design each one meticulously, perfect in its individuality.
Look at us. We too are different from each other. There are about six billion people on Planet Earth and each one looks different from the other. Not only our looks, but also our fingerprints, our tongue print and any other dimension we care to compare. We are supposed to be different, just as the snowflakes are. We think differently. We behave differently. And we have a different destiny to fulfill, using our unique but different talents.
How many of us revel in our uniqueness? Why do we want to be clones of others? Why do we compare ourselves with others? Why? When we know very well that we are made individually with love and care, with our unique features and unique talents. What makes us want the same things that the others have?
A baby is born perfect. We all agree with that. We do not want our baby to look like our neighbour’s baby. But as she grows up, we want her to be better, brighter, and smarter than all other girls in the neighbourhood. If she can’t be better, at least she should be equal to them. The comparison game begins from then on.
No one is left out of this comparison loop. We are all competing with each other. The irony of this game is that all of us are somewhere in the middle of this race. There are people behind us, and people ahead of us. However fast we run, there is still someone ahead of us. That is what brews competition. We do not realize that there are no winners in this game. It is futile even to play this game. What stops us from getting out of this unending race? It is the kick that our ego derives from people behind us, that keeps us going. From time to time we re-assure ourselves that we are better than some.
The truth is that we are just fooling ourselves. There is no one who is better than us, and there is no one who is worse than us. In fact there can never be any comparison between two ‘individuals’. You can compare things made from the same mould, but you can’t compare an individual piece of art with any thing. Each one of us is that piece of art. And the beauty of it all is that we are still in the process of being made. The maker is not through with us as yet. Unlike a snowflake that is complete before it falls, we are being re-shaped and re-defined everyday.
What is the software that God uses to refine us? Well, our thoughts are that software. Our thoughts determine our growth, our beauty, and our perfection. As you think, so you are. Give a thought to this statement, and you will surely discover the real you!
The snow has given way to sunshine again. It has taught the lessons it had come to teach. Let us shine bright in the Sun now. After all everything is transient in this World. Oh, that is another lesson for another day!!!
The Times of India, Shimla Plus, 02/02/08, Chitra Jha
It sets me thinking. If each snowflake finds its right place, what about us humans? We are the pinnacle of evolution, made in God’s own image. Surely we too are in our right places. Suddenly the whole human dilemma of ‘getting there’ gets cleared. We are already ‘there’. There is nowhere to go to. We must accept ‘What Is’. That includes our bodies, our jobs, our current way of living, and of course The Weather.
I hear people asking for snow when it is not snowing, and then complaining about it when it does. Same goes for rain, sunshine etc. We are never really satisfied. But once we realize that everything is as it should be, we become contemplative and eventually peaceful.
The other thing that snow teaches us is the ‘perfection’ of the Universe. Each snow flake is perfect in itself. If you observe a snow crystal through a powerful microscope, you can see its perfect formation. If God has given so much attention to a snow flake, how much more attention He would have given to us. Yes, I agree that no one is really perfect, especially when we use our worldly parameters, but the nature says otherwise. Since every thing in nature is perfect, by the same analogy we are perfect the way we are. We are beautiful in our perfection. We need to just believe in this truth.
Snow flakes are not only just perfect; each one is an individual as well. Yes, we can’t distinguish one snow flake from another but the fact remains that each insignificant looking flake has a different structure. Can you even imagine the care God took in making each one of them different from each other? He could have easily used a factory mould. How much simpler that would have been! But no sir, He did not take any short-cuts. He chose to design each one meticulously, perfect in its individuality.
Look at us. We too are different from each other. There are about six billion people on Planet Earth and each one looks different from the other. Not only our looks, but also our fingerprints, our tongue print and any other dimension we care to compare. We are supposed to be different, just as the snowflakes are. We think differently. We behave differently. And we have a different destiny to fulfill, using our unique but different talents.
How many of us revel in our uniqueness? Why do we want to be clones of others? Why do we compare ourselves with others? Why? When we know very well that we are made individually with love and care, with our unique features and unique talents. What makes us want the same things that the others have?
A baby is born perfect. We all agree with that. We do not want our baby to look like our neighbour’s baby. But as she grows up, we want her to be better, brighter, and smarter than all other girls in the neighbourhood. If she can’t be better, at least she should be equal to them. The comparison game begins from then on.
No one is left out of this comparison loop. We are all competing with each other. The irony of this game is that all of us are somewhere in the middle of this race. There are people behind us, and people ahead of us. However fast we run, there is still someone ahead of us. That is what brews competition. We do not realize that there are no winners in this game. It is futile even to play this game. What stops us from getting out of this unending race? It is the kick that our ego derives from people behind us, that keeps us going. From time to time we re-assure ourselves that we are better than some.
The truth is that we are just fooling ourselves. There is no one who is better than us, and there is no one who is worse than us. In fact there can never be any comparison between two ‘individuals’. You can compare things made from the same mould, but you can’t compare an individual piece of art with any thing. Each one of us is that piece of art. And the beauty of it all is that we are still in the process of being made. The maker is not through with us as yet. Unlike a snowflake that is complete before it falls, we are being re-shaped and re-defined everyday.
What is the software that God uses to refine us? Well, our thoughts are that software. Our thoughts determine our growth, our beauty, and our perfection. As you think, so you are. Give a thought to this statement, and you will surely discover the real you!
The snow has given way to sunshine again. It has taught the lessons it had come to teach. Let us shine bright in the Sun now. After all everything is transient in this World. Oh, that is another lesson for another day!!!
The Times of India, Shimla Plus, 02/02/08, Chitra Jha
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Shimla Beauties!
Whenever I look at the pretty girls in Shimla, I remember a remark made by a very famous columnist. He had just returned from Pakistan, and he wrote that when you are in Pakistan, you don’t really feel like a foreigner since every thing (people, sounds, food, market place, culture, dressing up style) are all so similar to those in India. He cheekily added that the only difference was that while you couldn’t find a single beautiful girl in India; in Pakistan it was hard to spot an ugly one. His column invited a lot of attack, and flak from various women’s groups. When I walk around in Shimla I see so many pretty faces that I feel like inviting the cheeky columnist to Shimla.
Shimla girls are generally petite, thin framed and delicate looking. There is some innocence about them. I love admiring their beautiful flawless complexion, and demure gait. These girls are pretty contemporary in their dressing up style. Far removed from the traditionally dressed, coy Himachali girls that peep from tourism posters! A visit to the Mall is made delightful by their presence. In fact you see more girls on the Mall than boys. Wonder why?
I am told that there are ‘Upper Shimla’ girls, and ‘Lower Shimla’ girls. Upper Shimla girls are supposed to be the smarter ones, since they come from the rich orchard owning families. They go to the best schools and join ‘St, Bedes College’ (the most prestigious and happening college in Shimla!) (Preity Zinta is an Upper Shimla girl.) I wonder if our concept of ‘upper’ and ‘lower’ has something to do with this perception! No one has yet told me about ‘Upper’ and ‘Lower’ Shimla boys. Why is this distinction reserved for only girls?
On the other side of the spectrum are these old Himachali gentlemen. They are real gentlemen! They dress up in proper British style: lounge suits and head gear, completing the look with a walking stick or long handled umbrella (reminding you of a bygone era). Observing them is a pleasure I often indulge in. They evoke love, respect, and awe in equal measure. So my focus is very clear: young Shimla girls and old Shimla gentlemen!
What takes my cake is the fact that while gentlemen are all very well clad at all times (in keeping with the weather!), girls are indeed a brave lot. While I trudge along wearing pullover, overcoat, muffler, cap etc. I see smiling, comfortable girls in just a teeny-weeny cardigan, buttons all undone (I feel cold just looking at them). Now that the weather has taken a turn for a promising Shimla winter, it will be interesting to note any change in the local attire.
Speaking of weather, the ‘cold’ of Shimla is far superior and refreshing to any other ‘cold’ that I have experienced in my life. The air is crisp and promising. The sun is warm and friendly, and the glow on the people’s face is absolutely eclectic. I pray for it to snow everyday, but so far the weather god has not played along. I guess I need to keep my fingers crossed as well!! In any case I have purchased enough woolens to welcome a white winter, I do not know if pretty Shimla girls have taken any such steps!! I truly admire the Bindaas Babes of Shimla!! May God bless them!!
The Times of India, Shimla Plus, 19/01/08, Chitra Jha
Shimla girls are generally petite, thin framed and delicate looking. There is some innocence about them. I love admiring their beautiful flawless complexion, and demure gait. These girls are pretty contemporary in their dressing up style. Far removed from the traditionally dressed, coy Himachali girls that peep from tourism posters! A visit to the Mall is made delightful by their presence. In fact you see more girls on the Mall than boys. Wonder why?
I am told that there are ‘Upper Shimla’ girls, and ‘Lower Shimla’ girls. Upper Shimla girls are supposed to be the smarter ones, since they come from the rich orchard owning families. They go to the best schools and join ‘St, Bedes College’ (the most prestigious and happening college in Shimla!) (Preity Zinta is an Upper Shimla girl.) I wonder if our concept of ‘upper’ and ‘lower’ has something to do with this perception! No one has yet told me about ‘Upper’ and ‘Lower’ Shimla boys. Why is this distinction reserved for only girls?
On the other side of the spectrum are these old Himachali gentlemen. They are real gentlemen! They dress up in proper British style: lounge suits and head gear, completing the look with a walking stick or long handled umbrella (reminding you of a bygone era). Observing them is a pleasure I often indulge in. They evoke love, respect, and awe in equal measure. So my focus is very clear: young Shimla girls and old Shimla gentlemen!
What takes my cake is the fact that while gentlemen are all very well clad at all times (in keeping with the weather!), girls are indeed a brave lot. While I trudge along wearing pullover, overcoat, muffler, cap etc. I see smiling, comfortable girls in just a teeny-weeny cardigan, buttons all undone (I feel cold just looking at them). Now that the weather has taken a turn for a promising Shimla winter, it will be interesting to note any change in the local attire.
Speaking of weather, the ‘cold’ of Shimla is far superior and refreshing to any other ‘cold’ that I have experienced in my life. The air is crisp and promising. The sun is warm and friendly, and the glow on the people’s face is absolutely eclectic. I pray for it to snow everyday, but so far the weather god has not played along. I guess I need to keep my fingers crossed as well!! In any case I have purchased enough woolens to welcome a white winter, I do not know if pretty Shimla girls have taken any such steps!! I truly admire the Bindaas Babes of Shimla!! May God bless them!!
The Times of India, Shimla Plus, 19/01/08, Chitra Jha
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